Girl Talk

I’ve been reading Girl Talk to dig deeper into God’s perspective on friendships and to challenge myself to do it God’s way. I am privileged to be on this journey alongside other wonderful women God has connected me with through my neighborhood, my community and especially my awesome church - CANVAS Church!

I have always valued friendships and tried to be diligent about growing and preserving the relationships that I have with others. But I must admit that at times it can be quite difficult to prioritize when there are so many things competing for my attention … husband, kids, dinner, laundry, sports, music lessons, bill paying, house cleaning, church functions, etc. In fact, there have been times I have felt that friendship time must be optional when faced with the choice like having a clean house or a latte with a friend. But to be honest, Girls, we need each other. God created us as relational beings – first to in relationship with Him (love God) and secondly to be in relationship with others (love people).

Matthew 22: 37–39 Jesus replied: “ ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ ”

In fact, most women define themselves by their relationships: I am a mom of two, a wife of 10 years, the youngest daughter, a sister. Or: My daughter and I are at odds. My husband and I are totally happy. This is who we are.

And what does God say about relationships? In the beginning, God said “It is not good for man to be alone.” God created us in His image, and designed us to be in relationship with Him and each other. That’s God’s game plan for us.

He never intended for us to be alone or isolated, but that is what Satan would have you to believe. That’s why we, as Christians, are always under attack. We have an enemy that knows his best tool is to divide and conquer. To separate us from each other so that we fail to love and encourage each other.

So what are we to do with such an enemy? Satan can only take what we give him, so let’s refuse to walk into his trap! Be aware of his schemes, and refuse to give him space.

In Ephesians 4: 2-3, Paul instructs us as to how we should treat each other. “Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.”

Make EVERY effort. Not just some, but every effort. That tells me that at times it might take all that we have to be humble, gentle, patient, etc. But nevertheless, we are expected to do it! Why? Because it keeps unity in the body of Christ.

You can read more about it in Ephesians chapter 4. And there is a great example of this in 2 Corinthians 2: 5-10, as Paul writes a letter to the Church @ Corinth, when one of their own had caused great grief in the church. The people of the church basically ‘punished’ this person with their actions toward him, and Paul instructed them to forgive and comfort him and to reaffirm their love for him. Even though this person might have seemingly ‘deserved’ this type of response, it was not good for the people to continue in that way. It could aid the enemies’ schemes and eventually allow him to outwit God’s people. (See 2 Corinthians 2:8-11). And most importantly, it was prohibiting the unity of the church.

When we are aware of the enemies’ schemes and we refuse to give him place in our relationships, we effectively handcuff his plot to divide and conquer.

When we are aware of God’s plan for our relationships, and we make every effort to keep the peace and unity of them, we are continually keeping the body of Christ in unity as well.

Why is it so important to keep the body of Christ in unity? The answer can be found in John 17:22-23

John 17: 22-23 “I have given them the glory that you gave me, that they may be one as we are one. I in them and you in me. May they be brought to complete unity to let the world know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me.”

It is a witness to the world, so they may know Jesus by what they see in us. What are your relationships saying to those around you? If you aren’t sure, just take the Paul Challenge this week, and see how you do. Are you humble, gentle, patient with your family and friends? Are you making every effort to keep unity?

If God is using the Paul Challenge to help your relationships grow toward godliness, I’d love to hear about it. Be sure to post a comment!